Manu's Satroopa: Chapter 1

Pindar river had been on a rampage for the last 12-13 hours. The water was only a few feet below the main bridge that connected Karanprayag to the world outside. On normal days, the bridge was at least forty feet above the surface of the river. Known for its violent flaw, Pindar was more devastating than usual. Many houses had been submerged, all the pigs had drowned from the local slaughterhouse, and my wife had left me. I went to the Shivalay, to see the river up close. I sat on the third last step above the water level.

The Slim muddy path went downhill. It was very difficult to walk without slipping. I held on to the handrails tightly as I made my way to the river. Half of the Shivalay was already underwater by the time I reached. Fallen trees and debris had been washed all around the temple complex.

I found her there, stuck under a fallen branch. Her hind legs were completely crushed. The water was barely a few feet away from where she lay, rising continuously. She would have drowned completely within an hour. Her cries would have been snubbed, releasing her from everything there was. The crushing weight, the blinding pain, loneliness- all gone. I wasn't sitting far away. Our eyes met the second I looked at her. Her cries stopped for a minute as we made eye contact, hope relieving her blinding pain. Then I looked away. I couldn't help her, I couldn't even help myself. In an hour we'd both be gone, along with all the worldly things affecting us. Our physical bodies tied us here, to this hurtful plain we called reality, slowly snipping away even the ethereal parts of us. 

After a few minutes of looking away, I couldn't look away anymore. The cries were gnawing my mind. I looked carefully at her, white fur with brown patches on her shoulders and face. Her fur was drenched, and muddy. Both her hind legs were twisted into abnormal angles- I assumed the heavy branch fell on her while she was laying down. How long had she been here, I wondered. Was she too being punished for her immorality, like I was? Haunted by her own actions. Perhaps she had wounded a dog and left it to die. Maybe she had fucked up in her life preceding this. I wondered if she had been human in her last birth. I wondered if it was better to be a dog than to be me. Her cries echoed through the sunken complex again as I wondered. I hadn't looked away for a second, her eyes seemed to dig into me. And as if on a cue, right when I felt her gaze break my desperation, the bells in the Shivalay started ringing. Must have been the water but I froze. 

I felt as if I was being watched. 'You want to take your own life because your own weaknesses dictate you. You destroyed everything I gave you,' I heard in my head. It perfectly resonated with the bells tolling, the voice continued, magnified suddenly, 'and now you destroy not just your own life but also the life of another being. You are not just a coward but a murderer too.'

By this time, my knees were under the chilly water. I brought myself back from my thoughts. The escape made me realise that the crying had stopped. the dog was now under water and was too exhausted to be able to keep its head above water. I ran through the chilly water and as I reached her my legs gave up. The water around had made the branch much lighter and I picked it with all my strength and shoved it away from the mutt's legs. She was nearly dead when I picked her up and put her on my shoulders. The water had reached my waist by now and my lower body barely responded. I held her tightly with one hand and crawled through the water. If I didn't leave the water soon, I would have probably died of Hypothermia. 

Exhausted, I fell on the ground as soon as I was a good few metres away from all the water. She lay on my chest, we both shivered uncontrollably but her body seemed to fill me with life and purpose. I looked her in the eyes, she was looking into mine and I knew my body gave her all the hope she needed. 'I am going to call you Satroopa, Manu's Satroopa.'